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In this post, I’m going to be sharing all of the key things I did to heal my uterus, my body, and my mind from sexual trauma. If you want to hear more about my story, you can watch my interview with Reese of Yes Supply here. In this interview, I share more of my own trauma healing journey and how remembering my childhood sexual trauma in my early twenties led me to the path of opening my psychic healing abilities.
1. Strong Role Models Who Inspire You To Heal From Sexual Trauma
A year or so before I remembered my own childhood sexual trauma, I watched a very powerful interview with a spiritual teacher who had experienced a very intense, abusive childhood. I remember watching this interview in my tiny University dorm room and thinking to myself, “Wow, she must be the strongest person ever to live through all of that, survive, and then have a thriving career and business now.”
I was totally blown away by her transparency, her vulnerability, her authenticity, her strength. Everything about this woman inspired me. When I started to remember my own trauma (and the beginning was the hardest) I would think about her all the time. And I would say to myself repeatedly, “If she can get through it, so can I. She is living proof that it is possible to survive this and go on to thrive.”
Having this woman as the key example, my personal superhero, in the back of my mind during those first few years was key. Because mindset on the healing journey is really everything. It is such a big part of this whole experience. So my best piece of advice is to find someone with a story that inspires you, and cling onto that. If you need strength, borrow someone else’s. If you need courage, borrow someone else’s. If you need hope, borrow someone else’s. Because soon enough – that strength, courage, and hope you see in someone else will become deeply integrated into who you are. Because ultimately, everything you see in someone else that you admire is something that is being mirrored within you.
2. Yoni Steaming to Heal From Sexual Trauma
One of the many things I was intuitively drawn to, especially at the beginning of my journey, was yoni steaming. I found a YouTube video (in fact, it was THIS exact video that I watched) and purchased the little Hamilton Beach slow cooker she recommended. The tip was genius – and I still have the same setup to this day. If I’m remembering correctly, I bought mine for $15 at Walmart.
Aside from the physical health benefits of the herbs, yoni steaming was helpful to me for two main reasons. Firstly, it put me more in touch with my body. Because of the trauma, I had always felt really disconnected from my body. Yoni steaming helped me to get more intimate with myself. That alone was healing, because it felt like a reclamation activity. Secondly, I would have very intense emotional releases after steaming. I would cry for a very long time. I didn’t understand it at the time (this was prior to awakening my psychic/energy healing abilities) but I was expressing the repressed emotion that my womb was holding.
3. Speaking My Truth
When Reese asked me if I would like to participate in one of her client interviews, I was excited. I felt really ready to share my story. After that interview, I felt empowered in a way that I had never really experienced before. There was a huge shift in my own energy after that, because in a way, I was standing up for my own self and my own authority through that experience. It also marked the first experience I had where I felt like I was expressing my purpose in a big, public way.
Expressing my truth and allowing myself to share my stories around my trauma AND my healing have been seriously life changing. I’ve been blessed to have some truly incredible friends who have listened to my stories, offered support where they can, and never judged me. That alone is healing.
Getting things up and OUT of your body through speaking your truth (when, for many of us, we’ve had to swallow down our words, tears, and complete unbridled expression as a means for survival) wherever it feels right for you – in a therapist’s office, with a healer, even by yourself with a pen and notepad, with a group of trusted friends…or even more publicly, if you feel called to use your story to help others, is incredibly empowering. It helps us to release shame. It helps us to step into the energy of – this is part of my story. It’s part of my experience, but it is not WHO I am. It is something I have been through.
4. Reclaiming My Body
We do all sorts of things to cope with abuse and trauma, especially for those of us who have experienced sexual trauma. I did a lot of things to hide and cover up my body. Weight gain, breakouts, purposely dressing down or hiding my body in baggy clothes. Honestly, I’ve done it all.
I did a ton of deep healing work around feeling safe to be seen in my body, in a more feminine way, and after I did a lot of that deep energetic clearing work on myself (using the modalities I use in my client sessions) I started to enjoy, for the first time in my life, dressing up and having fun with clothes. I had more fun with my nails, my skincare, my makeup. Of course, these are more stereotypically “feminine” rituals, however, I personally did find them all empowering. So I noticed what made me feel good and empowered in my own body, and I did more of that. I grew my hair out a little longer, started to dress a little bit more femininely, enjoyed dressing up and buying clothes, and doing my makeup on a more regular basis.
To me, this was a big reclamation activity. Because it was about being at home and having full ownership of my body. The best way to intuitively know what you need to feel this sense of reclamation of your body is to ask yourself, “What could I do/be/wear/have that would make me feel in full ownership of my body and space?” and see what comes up. Your intuition always knows. So trust her.
5. Energy Work to Heal From Sexual Trauma
When my psychic healing abilities blasted online, I immediately started to get downloads of light codes and energy healing modalities, which I put to work on myself right away. I was clearing HUGE amounts of dark, dense trauma energy. Clearing at this deep of a level turned me into a completely different person. I really had no idea how much of my personality and being had been shaped by the trauma I was still living with, and when I started to let go of those huge, old layers I started to change a lot. My personality shifted, because I was no longer shaping myself around the degree of coping I was just used to doing. I no longer had to navigate these internal battles with my thoughts and personality – because I had completely cleared the energy of these big things I had been dealing with my whole life.
If you are interested in working with me privately for energy work and energy clearings, please book one of my Free Energy Audit calls. In this call, I’ll read your energy and tell you about how I can help you, plus make a recommendation for my services.
6. Forgiveness
I truly believe forgiveness is the answer to pretty much everything. Forgiveness has been linked to deep, spiritual growth and expansion in my own journey. It hasn’t always been easy. There have been resentments and anger. Those are just as valid, but I made the choice to forgive. Forgiveness is empowering.
Don’t force forgiveness. It will come when it comes. That’s the truth.
It helped to see the big picture of everything. In the moments where I was forgiving the men who were involved in my trauma, I was forgiving them, and their mothers and their fathers, and their grandparents, and their parents, and every little single thing that had contributed to their darkness. Every single little thing that had ever existed that led up to the abuse, I forgave it all. And I tried to understand it best I could, until I felt like I actually did. Then, all the little pieces made a lot more sense. And I learned eventually that it was never really about me at all, it was about them – their own hurt, their own pain, and what had been inflicted on me had never truly been about me at all. That realization was the most freeing thing of all.
Our human ego will get caught up in why WE were so fucked up in the first place to have this happen to us. Forgiveness taught me that I had been looking my whole life for the wrongness in me, instead of just accepting the wholeness of it all. It was a lot bigger than me. The trauma really had nothing to do with me. Their darkness was drawn to my light.
7. Self-Compassion Is Key to Heal Sexual Trauma
At every level and layer of healing.
In my childhood, one of the men who was involved in my trauma once said to me during one of these traumatic sexual experiences: “You know, you’re going have to do this when you grow up anyways.”
Internally, I harboured this deep, intense fear of being a “grown up”. I resisted money and clients because, in my subconscious mind, if I had those things, I would be a “grown up”. And I had connected that – with, well, what had happened in my abuse.
I remember coming to that realization. At first, I was frustrated and angry with myself. Then, I had really no other choice than to be compassionate. Because that part of me that was clinging to that fear had started when a little version of me could not possibly process what she was going through, let alone the idea that when she grew up – it would continue.
8. Use your experience to help others heal from sexual trauma
I was in a group coaching program when the coach said to me, “Maybe you’re going to help women who’ve been through sexual abuse one day.”
I gulped, and thought to myself, there’s no way I could ever do that!
Fast forward to about six months later. I’m sitting in the tiny back room of a local crystal store in attendance at a podcast recording, staring at a white dreamcatcher on the wall when I get this download from my spirit guides: “Your life purpose is to help people heal from sexual abuse.”
Well, I can’t be too shocked, right? In hindsight, all I can think is…yeah, of course that’s what it was!
You might just want to contribute in whatever way you can – donating to a good organization, putting in some volunteer hours, or whatever you feel guided to do. You might even feel inspired to learn a new modality or become a coach, practitioner, or healer. (In fact, it might even be the thing that ignites your journey). So be open to it. You’ll be guided.
It feels good to pay it forward. We’re really just all helping each other turn our lights back on.
